Talking Web Head
by Raymond M. Coulombe

Now the Internet has a computer generated newscaster by the name of Ananova. (www.ananova.com of course!) The green haired girl with the odd accent caught the attention of the major broadcast news networks. All the big boys did a piece on her.

Frankly, she doesn't seem any less artificial than the other talking heads. The old pros may scoff, but I think Ananova and other computer generated personalities will play a big role in our future.

"But she really isn't a journalist," they say, as if the talking heads on the tube are. We never see the people who actually compile the stories. It's the behind the scenes people, people not pretty enough for the on-air camera, who do all the work. Observant viewers see the earphone sticking in the empty head of the TV "journalist." The on-air personality is little more than a meat puppet.

I hope their heads are empty and they were chosen for the quality of their voice and a trustworthy face. If independent thoughts are locked in those perfectly coiffured heads, it would be a sad waste indeed.

If Leonardo Decaprio can interview the President of the United States, then there are no journalistic standards at all. You may think it harsh of me, but remember, I'm part of the club. I too have a degree in Journalism. I've seen how the news is made from the inside. That's why I write fiction; it's the only way to tell the truth. But I digress.

The real story here is that the white collar job of broadcaster is now animated. The big sucking sound you hear is cushy white collar jobs being sucked into another automated black hole. Sure, it was all fun and games in the name of progress when it happened to blue collar workers, but now they are worried.

Where will it all lead? Maybe the world of William Gibson's Idoru is just around the corner. Maybe Ananova 5.0 will demand a better contract or run off with her flesh and blood lover.

Still, I'll miss the flesh and blood journalists. There is something special about a major broadcast personality interviewing a sock puppet.

That's all for now . . . time for my meds.

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