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Frequently Asked Questions

Q: What are you looking for?

A: Fiction. Not poetry. Not plays. Just fiction. We are looking for science fiction, fantasy or stories with some kind of metaphysical twist to them. Horror is acceptable, but not one of our main features.

Q: Why can't I submit my story about Xena joining the crew of Voyager?

A: Because we'll send Pat over to hurt you. Seriously, this is not a fan site. We don't want fan fiction, no matter how well written. Most of these characters are copyrighted, and we don't feel like getting sued by the creators of Highlander or Buffy.

Certain characters, such as King Arthur and Robin Hood, are public domain, and could be used. You will have to do something original to get that kind of story accepted, but that won't get you rejected out of hand the way a Babylon Five story will.

Q: Do you accept poetry?

A: No.

Q: Really?

A: Really.

Q: Please?

A: Sorry, no. We only like dirty limericks, Springsteen lyrics about escaping from New Jersey and the liner notes from Clash albums.

Q: How long until I find out if I'm accepted?

A: We try to do this as fast as we can, but the volume we get is enormous. You should hear within three to four months. It may be shorter, but we'll try not to go longer.

Q: Will I get feedback on a rejected story?

A: Probably not. Our volume is too high to critique every story. The normal course of action is you we get an acceptance letter or a rejection letter.

Q: Are you hiring?

A: No. We are a four person operation, and aren't looking to expand at this time.

Q: Are you all as charming, witty and great in the sack as you seem?

A: Yes. Yes we are.

Q: Can I sell my story to somebody else?

A: Sure. We only buy one time rights. If you try to sell elsewhere, it will be a reprint, which usually pays at a lower rate. We are fine with it, but you will want to keep the consequences in mind.

Q: Why shouldn't I send a Word attachment?

A: MSWord uses code to represent commas, quotes, etc. If you try to paste Word into our HTML editor, the code shows up instead of the punctuation.

For example:
"Hey Joe! What's up?"

Will look like this:
&8230;Hey Joe&8200; What&8221;s up&8222: &8231;

Which makes us say
"Hey, Bill Gates! &*@# you, you @$$ &*@#!"
And want to reject your story.

Word Perfect pastes fine into everything else, so it's not like it has to be difficult. Microsoft just sucks and wants us to use their lousy HTML editor, which our webgoddess hates, on account of it's just a bunch of bugs with a line of code wrapped around them.

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